Sweet, Joyful Peace

 

so we go out, my man and i, and i am
in the doldrums, i am down, down, down.
"what's wrong, baby?" he asks me and i
lie to him, "oh, nothing," i say, and i try to
smile, for he has said, after he came home
and gave me the kiss i asked for and told
me those words my heart had needed so
badly to hear tonight, that i am beautiful
when i smile.

and we sing, he and i, and i am better than
it sounds inside my head because everyone
applauds and i am surprised, as i always am,
when doing something that makes me feel so
good, so right, brings me sweetness i feel i
don't deserve.

and people we know invite us to sit at their
tables and i say, "please, baby, can we just
sit here together, you and i, and let me play
with your hand as it holds mine and let me
try and find inside of myself the strength to
get through the rest of this very bad day."
and the man i love, the man who loves me
even when i am at my most unlovable tells
me, "yes. we can do this any way you want
to." and i am finally, at the end of this long,
hard day, at peace inside myself.

no matter what is said about me, no matter what
ghosts try and haunt me, i am at peace in this
moment, for the man i love, who loves me totally,
is waiting for me to shut off this electronic box
and he will whisper sweet, soft things to me and
i know that i can live through anything as long
as i remember that no matter what has happened
in the past, no matter what tomorrow brings, at
this moment in my life, i am loved.

denise

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